Irish Car Bomb Cheesecake Cupcakes!

Offensive name.  Delicious taste.  The taste makes up for the name.

Yeah, one of these is missing.  I had to do quality control!

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Moving forward...

Basically, I have three levels of locavorism.  First, I try to find it within 100 miles.  If that doesn't work, I try to find it from Wisconsin (lots of things that I can get from Door County - which is about 200 miles away).  If that doesn't work (orange juice, sugar, etc.) I find it from the US.  If that doesn't work, I don't buy it.

Unless it's alcohol, which is for some reason exempt from all the rules.

So, I have a dear friend who likes all things Irish alcohol related.  She also likes cheesecake.  And Tuesday was her birthday.  So, yeah, Irish alcohol is not so much local.  I get that.  But it was important, and it was for a friend so it doesn't count.  Sort of like birthday cake has no calories.  Right?  Right?!?

Here's the super cool thing that I learned making this recipe.  This recipe calls for an Oreo Cookie crust.  I feel like the Oreo Cookie crust is integral to the success of the recipe.  You put the Oreos - whole - into a food processor, so all of the filling part gets mixed in with the cookie part which is DELICIOUS!  But how, I ask myself, will I defend purchasing Oreos on my locavore blog?  Do I try to make them myself?  That sounds like a LOT of work, and something that will have very poor results.  I think the preservatives are part of what make Oreos so delicious.  I'm certain that the same applies to Cheetos.

Anyway, I digress.  I Googled "Where are Oreos made?"  According to Wikipedia (so we know it MUST be true), the Oreo was developed in Chelsea, in New York City, in 1912.  Also, they were originally made with lemon meringue filling.  Gross.  Oreo comes from the Greek word for appetizing.

All very interesting, but where the F-bomb are they made?

So I Google again.  This time "Oreo Factory."  Same Wikipedia article.  And then, something even better.  A website called "amusingfacts.com" that apparently also has a fool proof method for me to "Lose Seven Pounds in 7 Days With The Perfect Diet - Free Report Reveals How!"  There's a picture of a doctor.  It MUST be true!  I trust this website completely!

Anyway, according to amusingfacts.com, the largest cookie factory IN THE WORLD is in Chicago, IL.  And what do they make there?

OREOS!

Holy crap.  This is the mother-load. I validated it.  Google: "World's Largest Cookie Factory." 

According to Yahoo Associated Content: "The World's largest cookie and cracker factory as well as the world's largest ice cream cone factory are located in Chicago. Nabisco (cookie and cracker factory) is located at 7300 S. Kedzie Avenue on Chicago's south side and Keebler (ice cream cone factory) is also located on Chicago's south side at 10839 S. Langley Avenue."

Sweet fancy Jesus.

Nabisco is 98.2 miles from my house.  Keebler is 102.

Now, I'm not really a fan of Nabisco.  Well, I'm not really a fan of Kraft, which owns Nabisco.  They use GMOs; specifically the Genetically Engineered Bovine Growth Hormone (rBST), which I am very strongly against.  But that's another rant for another day.  Nothing is going to stand between me and my Oreos!

Yeah.  It's cheating.  I get that.  But on the other hand, is it really that different than buying the bacon from the bacon factory that's 5 blocks from my house?  Probably.  Oh well.

I originally found this on the internet, but have had it for a few years and have made a couple modifications.  I can't really say where I found it...

These are possibly my favorite cupcakes ever.  They are very alcoholic tasting.  But it's all baked off, so you can eat them and drive.   Eat them with a fork or spoon, because they are ooey-gooey delicious!

Individual Irish Car Bomb Cheesecake Cupcakes

Makes 24 Individual Mini Cheesecakes

Preparation: Heat oven to 350 degrees F. Line two cupcake pans with cupcake liners.

Oreo Cookie Crust

• 48 Oreos (L) (Makes me giggle to write that!)
• 12 tablespoons Irish Whiskey

Instructions:
You will probably want to do this in 4 batches, 12 Oreos and 3 tablespoons whiskey.  Otherwise the food processor gets too full and the cookies at the bottom turn into mush while the ones on the top are still totally intact.

Place Oreos in a food processor and pulse in three-four 2-second bursts. Pour Jameson whiskey in and pulse two more time to combine. Alternatively, place Oreos in a Ziploc and using a rolling pin or meat tenderizer, crush cookies and mix in Jameson whiskey. Measure out 1 tablespoon of Oreo crumb into each well and firmly press Oreo crumbs down.  I found the best way to do this is with my thumbs, after greasing them slightly with olive oil.

Cheesecake

• 5 blocks (20 oz) cream cheese, softened (Not local... Cream Cheese is one thing I have NOT been able to find, and it is something I am going to try to make on my own.  I suppose I could have bought Philadelphia, knowing now what I know about Kraft, but I didn't.  And I won't.)
• 2 cup sugar
• 4 eggs (L)
• 2 tablespoon vanilla extract
• 1/2 cup Bailey’s Irish Cream
• 1 cup heavy cream, divided (L)
• 2/3 cups of dark chocolate chips
•  1/2 cup Guinness

Add cream cheese and sugar in a bowl and beat until mixture is smooth. Add eggs and beat on low  until combined. Add vanilla and beat until combined. Add 1/2 cup heavy cream and beat until combined.

Place two thirds of cream cheese batter in one bowl (should be about 5 cups) and add Bailey’s Irish Cream into it. Use a sturdy spatula or a wooden spoon to stir until combined.  You should have about 3 cups remaining.

Add chocolate and remaining heavy cream into a glass bowl, and place over (but not touching) barely simmering water. Allow chocolate to melt, stirring regularly, and and keeping an eye on the water to make sure it doesn't boil.

Allow melted chocolate mixture to cool for five minutes before adding it into the remaining cheesecake batter. Once added, stir until combined and then add Guinness and stir until combined.

Pour chocolate Guinness cheesecake mixture first into the lined, crusted cupcake cups, then pour Bailey cheesecake mixture on top.  You could here swirl the two together, using a toothpick, but I prefer leaving the Bailey's in the center of the Guinness - like it would be if you dropped your shot glass of Bailey's into your half pint of Guinness.

Bake at 350 degrees for about 35-40 minutes. Let cheesecakes cool on oven rack with oven door open for an hour. Finished cheesecake will have a slightly sunken center.

Necessity may be the Mother of Invention, but Surplus is it's Father.

My mother taught me plenty of good things:  Be nice to people, always try your best, and don't take candy (or possibly Roofied drinks) from strangers.

My father taught me plenty of good things too:  Don't Panic (and carry a towel), TANSTAAFL, and non-interference is the prime directive.

Okay, I learned those things from Science Fiction, but my dad introduced me to Science Fiction, so it counts.

I guess what I'm saying is, at least for me, moms teach us to be good.  Dads teach us to be good at being ridiculous. And I mean ridiculous in the best way possible.  I mean ridiculous in terms of trying new things, being okay with failing, and making the most out of unexpected situations.

Up to this point, I have been cooking out of necessity.  I Googled the growing season for San Francisco, where the locavore movement originated, and learned it is more or less "year round," depending on what you are growing.  Do the same search for WI, and the growing season is approximately 175 days.  That's less than half of the year, people!  And, while it's been 90 degrees here the past few days, the pickings have still been slim.  I have been cooking with whatever I can get my hands on, creating my menu out of what I have, and the necessity of eating something and feeding my husband.

However, I am starting to get some very odd surpluses.  Rhubarb, which you have seen and which is very easily frozen for future use.  Also lettuce, which is not easily saved for future use, and which I've been trying to eat in salads - unfortunately not much else for salads is available yet.  And, since the days are getting hotter, the lettuce is getting bitter much faster than I can eat all of it.  Finally, sour cream and cottage cheese.  I recently started getting Oberweis delivery of my dairy products, and I have to fix the order every Monday night if I don't want something.  I haven't totally gotten the hang of what I need to get yet, or remembering to fix my "standing order" for the items I don't need, so I had three 1-pound containers of both cottage cheese and sour cream - three containers of each kind!  I like dairy, but that's a lot!

That is a lot of lettuce...

So, it's time to stop being "good," and start being ridiculous. Also, hopefully, through being ridiculous I can find ways to save some of this surplus for future use.  I remember a trivia question I heard once:

What is the only vegetable that cannot be preserved?

Answer: Lettuce.  Not a a good sign...

Today was the fourth of July, and that means our annual party at the Ward's house.  Bring a side dish to pass.  I am generally in charge of a salad, but I thought I would use up some of my surplus as well:

Kohlrabi Salad

So pretty... I think it kind of looks like fireworks!

One thing I hate about salad recipes specifically is that all vegetables are different sizes.  I could easily write "two kohlrabi bulbs" but what size bulb?  One bulb could easily yield anywhere from less than one to three cups or more.  And if I say "four servings," what does that mean?  Is it four full size servings?  Or for side dish servings?  So, for this recipe, I am using parts.  Figure out how much you want, and start with the kohlrabi.  Your final product will be four times bigger than how much kohlrabi you start with.  If you like something more, add more of it.  If you don't like an ingredient, or can't find it, substitute something else or omit it entirely.  This recipe is very flexible - I just made it up based on what I have.  I used two medium sized kohlrabi bulbs and this full recipe made enough to fill a 1/2 gallon container. 

• 2 parts kohlrabi (L)
• 1 part cucumber (L)
• 1/2 part radishes (L)
• 1/2 part carrots (L)

• Crumbled Feta Cheese, to taste (L)

Dressing:

• 1 tbsp garlic skapes (the green shoot of a garlic plant in spring.  If you have not tried these, get to the farmer's market now!) (L)
• 1 tbsp salt
• 1 tbsp fresh ground fennel seeds
• 1 tbsp fresh ground pepper
• 1 tsp minced hot Thai pepper (L*)
• 1 tbsp Oregano (L*)
• 1/4 cup olive oil
• 2 tbsp rice wine vinigar
• 2 tbsp sesame oil

Julianne vegetables and combine.

For dressing, combine first seven ingredients.  While whisking vigorously, slowly pour in the vinegar and sesame oil. Pour enough dressing on salad to lightly coat the vegetables, and stir to combine.  Do not add so much that the salad becomes soggy or greasy.  You likely will have some dressing left over for a future use.

Crumble feta cheese over salad, and serve cold.


Cottage Cheese Cupcakes with Sour Cream Frosting


Makes almost 4 dozen cupcakes:

• 4 2/3 cups flour (L)
  1 1/2 cups sugar
• 2 tbsp baking powder
• 1/4 tsp salt
• 4 eggs (L)
• 1/2 cup sunflower or vegetable oil
• 2 1/2 cups milk (L)
• 1 cup cottage cheese (L)
• 4 cups fruit, such as rhubarb, strawberries, raspberries, etc (I used a combo of all 3 (L*)

If you are using rhubarb, you will want to cook it slightly first, to get the water out.  The 4 cups of fruit should be total, after the rhubarb is cooked.  I used 2 cups rhubarb, 1 cup strawberries, and one cup raspberries.  In order to get two cups of cooked rhubarb, I placed 6 cups raw rhubarb, 2 tbsp honey, and a splash of vodka into a large stock pot.  Cook over low heat until the rhubarb has released most of its liquid, about 5 minutes.  The point is not to cook the rhubarb until it falls apart, just to get most of the water out.  Drain the rhubarb and, if desired, save the liquid for a future use (it's great mixed with lemonade as a drink!)

Preheat oven to 350, and line a muffin pan with cupcake liners.

In a large bowl (preferably a stand mixer) combine eggs, oil, milk, and cottage cheese, and beat until smooth.  Add dry ingredients, and mix until just combined.  Add fruit, and stir gently.  Scoop batter into prepared cupcake liners, and bake at 350 for 20 minutes.  Allow to cool thoroughly before frosting.

Sour Cream Frosting:

8 tbsp butter, softened (L)
2 cups sour cream (L)
1 tsp vanilla extract
1/2 tsp almond extract
1 tsp lemon juice
1/2 tsp salt
5 1/2 cups confectioner's (powdered) sugar

In a large bowl (preferring a stand mixer), beat together all ingredients except sugar.  Add sugar, and beat with an electric mixer until smooth.

Top cooled cupcakes with frosting.