A Return... Not Necessarily Triumphant

I've been absent for awhile.  And I don't just mean since my last blog post, but since I was really here, engaged, inspired.  There have been a lot of things going on: busyness at work, school taking my time, and a little bit of soul crushing depression.  But I would be passing the buck if I blamed my absence on any of those things.  No, none of that is the problem.  Something has been missing.  Inspiration.  What am I here to say?

I watch a lot of Food Network, and right now the big show is Next Food Network Star.  Each time I sit down to write, I hear Alton Brown's voice in my head asking "What is your POV?"

Great question, voices inside my head.  What is my Point of View?  What makes me special?  What do I have to offer?  Why should you read my blog over any of the other thousands of food blog choices that you have available to you?  Yeah, I'm a locavore, but frankly that's less interesting to me than those people who make everything out of bacon.  I mean, being a locavore is awesome, but I can't keep saying it over and over without getting preachy and/or boring.  I thought, for a few weeks there, that I was going to buy a farm.  That would have been fun.  Then "Home Grown, Home Made" could have been more than just a good tag line.  But, after a faulty basement to snap me back into reality, and some serious conversation, I think I've got other things I need to do before a farm can happen.

So, what do I have?  What is my Point of View?

The answer actually came to me in my other, other job.  When I'm not here, and when I'm not at my "real" job, and when I'm not in school, I'm a teacher.  And I'm a really good teacher.  But that's not my POV either.  Here's what happened:

I was teaching a class on how to be a successful college student, and it was made very clear to me that I couldn't let the students go early because they needed so many hours in the classrom for accreditation.  This was my first time teaching the course, and I guess I underestimated how long things would take, because, on the last day, there were two full hours and absolutely no content left.

And that was when it hit me: I'm a good teacher, I'm a good cook, I'm a good gardener, I'm a good advocate.

But I'm an excellent bull-shitter.

You want to talk about nothing?  I'll talk to you about nothing.  You want to talk about something I know nothing about?  I'll talk to you about that too.  One thing that annoys my husband about me is that I will answer questions that I don't know the answer to.  Not big important questions, not meaning of life questions, or which exit do I take, or is this fish still good questions, but the type of question that you can usually just reason your way through:

Him: Where did you learn that?
Me: I didn't.  But it makes sense, right?

He's actually taking to asking me: "Is that true, or are you just assuming?"  9 out of 10 times I'm assuming, but 7 of those 9 times I'm also right.

Bullshitting, and being able to make (marginally accurate) shit up, is a fairly useful skill to have.  Not all the time, of course, and I hope that I'm not coming off as an enormous d-bag right now.  I'm not talking about the kind of BSing that belittles people, hurts their feelings, or gets someone hurt.  I'm just talking about a little mental improvisation.  For instance, back to my classroom example, I played Joss Whedon's Weslean University commencement address and, in the 13 minutes that it played, I figured out how it related to the class.

BSing is also a very important skill to have in the kitchen.

When people tell me that they don't cook, it's often because it's too expensive.  This makes almost no sense to me - eating out is what's expensive.  It was this Oatmeal comic that helped push me, again, towards finding this particular POV.  If you're not reading The Oatmeal, you probably should be.

Cooking is absolutely expensive if that's how you do it - if you  go out and buy the  ten or more expensive ingredients you need for that one recipe, in much greater quantities than you need, and then let the remainder sit in your refrigerator or on your shelf until they rot. Statistics say that Americans throw out half of the food they come in contact with, and that the average family of four throws away $2275 each year in wasted food. 

So you've basically got three choices: eat out every meal, figure out how to use up what you've got left after making your recipe, or figure out how to make that recipe with what you've already got. 

And that, my friends, is my new POV.  Not the first, the second two!  How to BS your refrigerator to make what you want and use what you've got.  Because, if you can do that, cooking becomes a lot easier, a lot cheaper, and eating locally is just a matter of where you shop. 

Here's a recipe that I BSed a few months ago, and that I promised a friend I would post for him. I had three goals in this recipe:

-use up as much in my freezer as possible,

- get as many vegetables on the dinner table as possible (which, honestly, is the hardest part of being a WI locavore in the winter and early spring), and 

-serve beets to people who I suspected didn't eat beets because I'm kind of an ass like that; I think making people eat and like a stereotypically hated food is fun. 

My favorite part about this was that it died the pasta pink.
And everything is better pink!

Super Beet Pasta

• 1 lb pasta (your choice of what kind. Preferably something textured like rotini or bow-tie, but a spaghetti, fettuccine, etc would also work.)

• 2 lb beets, roasted (I used beets that I had roasted and frozen in the fall. You could really use any kind of vegetable you wanted here, or a combination I vegetables, but that would mean changing the name. Cook the vegetables first to your preferred doneness. You'll be cooking the final pasta just briefly, so of it's something you don't want to overcook you may want to under-cook it slightly. )

• 8 oz beet greens (I again used frozen greens here. You could really use any type of hardy green here, but I was going for a theme with the original recipe.)

• 1/2 cup beet green pesto (or any kind of pesto you want. If you want to make beet green pesto, use my base pesto recipe here and substitute beet greens for the basil. 

• 1 cup shredded Parmesan or Romano cheese (or whatever kind of cheese you like in your pasta)

• Salt and pepper as needed

Cook the pasta according to package directions until it is just under-done. Drain and rinse.

While the pasta is cooking, thinly slice the beet greens and then drop them in boiling water for about a minute. Drain, then transfer to a bowl of ice water to stop the cooking process. (Because I was using frozen greens, which were already cooked, I skipped this step and just sliced the greens thinly.). Cut the beets into bite sized cubes. Combine pasta, beets, greens, pesto, and 1/2 of cheese and toss until well combined. Top with remaining cheese and bake in a 375 degree oven until heated through and cheese is melty. 

There's not a lot to this dish, so it's flavor really depends on what you're putting into it. Make sure the pasta water is well salted, and that the pesto is flavorful and well balanced. Taste it before it goes into the oven, and add salt and pepper as needed. Make sure you're taking the saltiness of your cheese into account when you're tasting. 

As with most pasta, you can really add anything you want to this. Mushrooms would be a nice addition if you had some. You could also add a splash of heavy cream, or some tomato sauce. 

So that's it. Pasta is pretty easy to BS, which is why you'll see it so often on chopped. I love comments, so if you have any questions please ask them below. 

Eat Local Milwaukee, Week 2

How did week one of the Eat Local Milwaukee Challenge go?  Did you find some new local food that you like?  Did you work one more local salad into your dinners?  Did you pick up some local tomatoes and realize they taste SO MUCH BETTER than those fake tomatoes you get at the grocery store?

Or did you visit a locally sourced restaurant and use the opportunity to let them do the cooking? Did you grab a local beverage?

I hope you were able to find something new.  I was excited to check out Lagniappe Brasserie and La Merenda, and enjoy some local food that I didn't have to cook.  As per usual, the food was far too good for me to have pictures.  I would, in fact, be the worst food writer ever, because the food is gone and then I'm like, "oh, crap, I should have taken a picture of that.  Boy it was good.  Wish I could show my readers how pretty it was..."

Are you ready for week two?

It's still summer, and it's still warm, but the air has that fall feel about it.  Today I even put on a sweatshirt because I was chilly.  Riding my scooter home from work on Thursday, I was even cold.

I love fall.  Fall, to me, is the food season.  Spring is great, because there's finally something fresh to eat, but your choices are limited.  Summer is full of food, but there's not that much to write about - throw some meat on the grill, slice up some raw veggies and you've got yourself a meal.  Winter... well winter is just about not starving to death.

But fall...

Fall has got plenty of food - It's harvest season after all - but it also allows real cooking.  Not that the grill isn't real, but it's not the same as a braise.  It's not the same as baking.  Fall is the season of tomatoes, and squash, and heavy greens like kale, and soup.  It's the time for meals that take hours of cooking, because you want your oven on for hours, and because you're not too warn down from the cold and dark of winter to even want to cook.

So, to usher in the unofficial first week of fall (I totally support the equinox here, it's extremely important to me.  Labor day does not = fall!), and the fact that I got to wear leg warmers yesterday, the second week of the Eat Local Milwaukee Challenge features some more fall-ish treats.

This week, my CSA box included:

• The most beautiful head of lettuce I've ever seen
• Leaf lettuce
• Spinach
• Beans
• Beets and their greens
• Leeks
• Eggs
• Peppers (hot and bell)
• Tomatoes
• Eggplant
• Kale
• Carrots
• Dill
• Parsley

Don't forget, we already figured out that this box cost me about $13.

I cooked up and froze the beets, beet greens, and their kale.  The carrots will be canned tomorrow, and I made a HUGE salad to go with my fritatta tonight.

The menu for the second week of the Eat Local Challenge, if you're playing along:

• Saturday: Steak Salad
• Pick up whatever stuff you want for a salad, and as fancy or cheap of a steak as you're feeling.  NY Strip is great on a salad.  So is a skirt steak.  Spend your money on what you think is important!  I personally will be using my #1 favorite steak: flat iron.
• Sunday: Spaghetti Squash Carbonara
• No, you didn't miss it.  There's no spaghetti squash in my CSA box this week.  But there is quite a good deal of it ready to be picked in my garden.  Along with about 6 giant blue pumpkins!
• Split the spaghetti squash in half and scoop out the seeds (you can absolutely wash and bake up the seeds just like pumpkin seeds.  Anyone who has carved pumpkins with me knows that I'm only in it for the seeds, so this is an exciting proposition for me.)  Drizzle generously in olive oil and season with salt and pepper, and bake in a 350 degree oven for about 30 minutes, or until it is soft but still a little crunchy (don't let it get soggy).  Once it is done, run a fork gently through the spaghetti squash to pull it into the strings from whence it gets it's name (whence!). 
• While the squash is cooking, cook about 1/2 lb of bacon over medium heat until it becomes a light brown but is not yet crispy. Pour off most of the fat and then add about 1 tbsp minced shallots and 2 tsp minced garlic. Saute for 1 minute until the garlic and shallots are fragrant. Add the 1/4 cup white wine and cook until the liquid has completely evaporated.
•  In a medium bowl, whisk together two egg yolks and one whole egg, eggs together with 1 cup Parmesan cheese and two tablespoons chopped parsley. Season with salt and pepper. Combine the eggs with the bacon mixture, warming the eggs in the pan. (Do not let the eggs cook through.) Add the spaghetti squash and toss to thoroughly combine and until squash is heated through. Adjust seasoning, if necessary and serve immediately.
• Monday:  Date night!  Head out for some local food!
• Tuesday: Slow Cooked Rotisserie Chicken
• Season it as you want, and have it waiting for you when you get home from work!  I do recommend the brine, because without it the chicken gets a little dry.  Throw some potatoes in the bottom of the slow cooker and have a full blown meal waiting for you.
• Wednesday: Stuffed Peppers
• Save a chicken breast from Tuesday.  Combine with some cooked local Orzo pasta (pick it up at Outpost), whatever veggies you've got in your fridge, and some local feta cheese from the Clock Shadow Creamery.  Mix together, and stuff into some bell peppers.  Throw the whole thing on the grill for about 10 minutes on each side, or until the inside is hot and the outside is nicely charred.  If you've got especially big peppers, you might want to heat up the stuffing before putting it in the peppers.
• Thursday: Turkey Soup
• I've got some frozen turkey in my freezer that I think is actually from way back last Christmas.  Time to get that used up already!  So I'm going to make a turkey noodle soup with that, the Orzo I bought for Wednesday, and some yellow squash that's already in my fridge.  But, since I can't count on your having stockpiled almost year old turkey in your freezer, why not try the Turkey Cherry Chili that didn't make it into the cherry contest!  Make it a little end-of-summerier and add some corn.
• Friday: Fish Boil
• What is more local, Wisconsin, Fall food than a good old traditional Door County Fish Boil.  You can make it in your kitchen no problem - just don't use the gasoline/boil over trick!  When you're at Outpost on Wednesday, pick up some Rushing Waters Rainbow Trout, and why not try the fish boil seasonings available at The Spice House.

As always, let me know if there's anything I can do!  Enjoy your local eating!

At the Farmer's Market

Thank you to everyone who everyone who showed up at the South Shore Farmer's Market this morning for my cooking demo.  Also, thank you to those people who didn't show up - because I ran out of food near the end!

It was a good morning - which is unusual for me because I do not, as a general rule, enjoy the morning.  I am not one of those people who feels that the morning is this beautiful, amazing, peaceful time of day.  Wait, I retract that.  I believe all those things, I just prefer to enjoy that time under a pile of blankets with my eyes securely closed.  I've enjoyed a few sunrises, but they were all after a night out - on the way home to go to bed!

So, to wake up and get ready to cook at 6:30 is a bit much for me.  And that, considering I had been up late fretting about the whole to-do and how it would go.  Add to that the fact that I'm not supposed to have caffeine (it constricts your blood vessels, and mine are already constricted on their own) and I am on my own to be bright and cheery in the morning!

And so I did.  I dragged my butt out of bed, I prepped my supplies, and I went out to cook.

I feel like it went well.  It was lovely for being early - not too hot, not raining - and I had my farmers around me.  And I got my first opportunity to cook in front of people.  Fortunately, my belly dance classes have prepared me well.  Talking at a volume that will carry over a busy farmers market is about the same as talking over a class of music and ziling, but to be fair then all I have to say is "and a five, and a six, and a seven, and an eight."

My goal was to promote the farmers.  That is, after all, what I am here for most: to promote the farmers, to promote real food, and to promote people being less afraid to cook for themselves.  I feel like I did a good job of that.  Some of my favorite farmers were not there, which was sad because I would have like to share their meals with them.  In the end, they did the work.  How am I possibly to fail, when I am starting with something so good?

Hopefully I also brought a few new readers on board.  If I did, welcome!  I'm here to help you work a little more local into your life.  And also to rant about the food choices I see made around me.  I like bacon.  I like booze (more on that later).  And I like when I try something that surprises me.

As I said at my demo (if you were there) the trick to cooking from the farmer's market is to not be too set on a recipe.  If you find your recipe, write your list, and go to the market looking for exactly what you need, you're not going to be successful.  The market requires a little more flexibility.  I read a lot of recipes online, and I am highly annoyed by the reviews that read like this: "I tried this recipe and it was terrible.  I didn't have any heavy cream, so I substituted Kahlua.  I also didn't have any potatoes, so I substituted marshmallows.  The finished result was far too sweet.  Whoever wrote this recipe doesn't understand how to cook!"  Don't be that guy.  But at the same time, in order to cook from the farmer's market, you kind of need to be that guy.  But smarter.  It's about an understanding of how foods react, and what really can be substituted for what.  Kahlua can be substituted for cream - if it's dessert.  Potatoes can be replaced with, depending on the recipe, sweet potatoes, turnips, carrots, parsnips, and beets.  Depending on the recipe.  Cooking isn't like baking.  It's an art, not a science, and cooking from the farmer's market, or from a CSA, emphasizes that.  Whatta ya got?  What can you do?  If it doesn't work, keep it to yourself.  If it does, revel in your successes.

Here are my recipes from the farmer's market:

Peach and Basil Salad, with Saxony Cheese

• 2 lbs peaches, pitted, quartered, and those quarters cut in half
• 1/4 cup maple syrup
• 1/2 cup cubed Saxony Cheese or something Parmesan-y
• About 8 large basil leaves, thinly sliced
• Fresh ground pepper

Heat a grill to high heat.

Place the peaches in a large bowl.  Add the maple syrup, and gently stir to combine.  Over high heat, grill the peaches until warmed and slightly caramelized.  You can grill all the peaches, or you can leave a few ungrilled to create a variety of texture.

After about 5 minutes, remove the peaches from the grill and return to the bowl.  Allow to cool slightly.  Add cheese, basil, and a dash of freshly ground pepper.  Enjoy warm.

Zucchini "Pasta" with Lime Vinaigrette Dressing

I consider this recipe kind of a cheat, in that it's a good recipe base to alter.  Really, all you need is the zucchini, and in the summer that's pretty hard to get away from.  Don't have limes?  Use a high quality white wine, champagne, or white balsamic vinegar.  No tomatoes?  No problem!  Extra veggies?  Throw them in!  Top it with cheese or meat!  Looking for something more filling, add equal parts cooked spaghetti to the zucchini pasta.

One thing I meant to bring up at the market is that you do not need fancy tools to make this.  My sous-chef, Denise, has a mandolin, so we used it, but at home (where I don't have one: present idea!) I just use my box grater.  The pasta doesn't look quite as fancy, but it tastes just as good:

Zucchini "Pasta" cut on the mandolin.

Here is the recipe, as I served it at the market:

With the box grater, it's not quite as pretty...
but it's just as tasty!

• Lime Vinaigrette (This makes a HUGE batch.  While it saves well, you may want to cut it in half, or even quarter it)
• 1 cup freshly squeezed lime juice
•  zest of 2 limes (zest before you squeeze the juice!)
• 1/2 cup honey
• 1 tsp salt
• 1 Thai chili pepper, minced
• 3/4 cups olive oil
• 2 tbsp garlic scapes, minced

• 1 large zucchini, cut into thin pasta like strips
• 2 ears of corn
• 2 cups cherry tomatoes, cut into bite sized pieces
• Salt and freshly ground pepper

Combine vinaigrette ingredients and mix well.  I recommend making in a bottle or jar that you can close tightly, and then just shaking vigorously.   I also recommend making this dressing a few hours to the night before, to allow all the flavors to marry.

On a mandolin or box grater, create long strips of the zucchini and place in a large bowl.  With a sharp knife, cut the corn off of the cob and add to the zucchini.  Add the tomatoes and stir to combine.  Add enough dressing to coat the zucchini, but don't drown it - about 2 tbsp to a quarter cup is probably good, depending on the size of your zucchini.  Toss gently, and allow to sit for at least five minutes.  The acid in the dressing will start to break down the zucchini, and it should develop a texture more like cooked pasta.

Farmer's Market Breakfast Fajitas 

This is another really good cheater recipe.  You can basically take anything, put it on a corn tortilla, and call it a taco, fajita, or burrito.  Yes, these words do mean something, but if you actually get called out on it, just tell them you're taking artistic liberties.  Cooks are artists too!

The main recipe here is actually for the skirt steak itself:

Skirt Steak Fajita Marinade:

• 1/4 cup olive oil
• 1 tbsp soy sauce
• 1 tbsp balsamic vinegar 
• 1 tsp fresh ground pepper
• 2 tbsp garlic scapes
• 2 tbsp shallots
• 1 tsp buckwheat honey
• 1 tsp minced hot pepper (I used Thai Chilli because that's what I had)

Combine ingredients and mix well.  Place 2 lbs skirt steak into a freezer bag and pour in the marinade.  Seal up the bag, and give the whole thing a good massage to work the marinade into the steak.  Allow to marinate at least an hour, up to overnight.

Once you are ready to cook, heat a grill to high.  While you are waiting, prepare a double thickness of aluminum foil large enough to completely contain the steak.  Season the steak with salt and place on the grill.  Cook for about a minute and a half on each side, then transfer to the aluminum foil and wrap up tightly, sealing any ends to prevent heat from escaping.  Allow to sit for 10 to 15 minutes.  At this point, the steak is continuing to cook - it's not really resting.

Slice the steak very thinly against the grain, and serve with corn tortillas and whatever else you would like on your fajitas!

It's Morel Season!

I don't want to badmouth anybody.  I did that once before, and it didn't make me happy.  And, I want to support local farmers.  I want to speak well of them, I really do.  Farmers are and should be our only source for food.  "Food" that didn't come from a farm, in my opinion, is not really food.

My friend Shannon, for example, does not believe that dandelions are food.  Okay, I can buy that.  Dandelions are weeds, and it's a big leap to go from weed to food.  But I can name other weeds that are food: Mint, oregano, dill, chives, rhubarb, raspberries, and strawberries.  Plant any of those in your back yard, and then try to get rid of them the next year.  I grow my mint under the bushes in my back yard where nothing else can grow.  They are choking out the violets (which also aren't weeds.  They're the WI state flower!)  I have oregano popping up between the cracks in my patio.  It's a weed.  But it's delicious!  I would counter that with this: fruit roll-ups are not food.  They may be edible, but they are not food.  How do they get away with calling them "fruit?"  What kind of fruit stains your lips blue?  Oreos are not food.  I LOVE Oreos.  Loyal readers may recall my having a complete freak-out when I realized that Oreos were local.  They're delicious.  They're absolutely edible.  But I'm pretty sure they're not food.  Food should have substance.  Food should be meaningful.  "Junk Food" should not be called "Junk Food;" it should just be called Junk.

***Steps down off soap box... for now***

I had a very bad, very upsetting experience over the weekend.  It is, quite possibly, my favorite time of the year.  It's morel season.  And when I got an email from Ruegsegger Farms (I'm on the email list of pretty much every farmer I can find) letting me know that they had morels for $45 per pound (a good price in my opinion), I jumped!  I reached out to anyone I thought might not judge me for wanting to pay $45 per pound for mushrooms and put together a small order of two and a half pounds.  I emailed to have them waiting for me at the next farmer's market.

Oh!  All of the farmer's markets are currently closed.  But they do have an impromptu one going at Discovery World until the West Allis Market opens on May 5th.

I went to the market to pick up my mushrooms, and also got some asparagus, and skipped happily home (or, more specifically, back to my car) and started dishing out the mushrooms for my friends and family.

That's when the first bad thing happened.  I only had 2lbs, 4 oz.  Now, I have a pretty specific scale, but that's a whole quarter pound missing.  I had people order only a quarter pound, so that was a WHOLE order missing.  And, to be fair, $11.25.

I opened the bags, and that's when the second bad thing happened.  he first few mushrooms were moldy.  Some not so bad, some really bad.  So I sorted them out and found that half a pound of the 2 1/4 lbs I had was moldy.

This is the saddest thing in the history of ever.

So I went back and complained.  The girl working the stand looked at me like it was my problem.  She literally asked me if I couldn't just cut that part off.  No.  I'm sorry.  When I'm paying $45 per pound for mushrooms, I cannot just cut that part off.  If you want to sell them to me on the cheap, I absolutely will take the moldy ones off your hands.  But, until then, you will sell me a quality product.

I went through each one of their mushrooms, one by one, and picked out the good ones.  Their scale said I was over, but when I got home mine still said I was under by an ounce.  I weighted out a pint of water just to make sure mine was right (a pints a pound the world around... but not on their scale I guess).

I don't know anything about Ruegsegger farms.  I don't go to the markets that they're at regularly.  They were at the St. Ann's Market over the winter, and I went there when the Winter Farmer's Market was closed, but not more than that - even though it was closer to my house.  It was pretty small, and there was a lot of crafting stuff which annoys me... This is my grocery store, people.  I love a good craft fair/flea market, but not at my grocery store.  Also, the two times I was there they had a clown... which just makes me lose my appetite. 

Not knowing anything about them, I don't want to imply that they're trying to cheat anyone.  Maybe their scale just got knocked out of calibration.  They sell local products, not just from their farm, which is good.  Support the local businesses!  And because of this, they always seem to have a good selection.  They've got a good website with online ordering, and some prepared stuff too, which is nice for people who aren't crazy like me.  I think they're a little expensive.  $4.25 for eggs is more than I like to spend, but I've spent $4.00 (I prefer $3.50 if I can find it...)  $4.00 per pound for whole chickens is a little high - I'm used to $3.25-$3.50.  So, not crazy expensive.  But a little higher than what I think it should be.  And, now that I don't trust them to sell me a quality product... they're probably off my list.  Make your own decision, though.

Anywho, I got home with my good mushrooms, rationed them out, avoided the impulse to steal one mushroom from each of the other bags (What?  I'm only human!  You'd do the same if you were doling out tiny gold pieces!), and started cooking.  Regardless of what it took to get them, morel mushrooms are one of the most amazing foods in the world - compounded by the fact that they're only available for a few weeks each year.  If we could somehow get morel season and soft shell crab season to be at the same time... that would probably be really bad because I wouldn't sleep, I wouldn't leave the house, and I would probably put on 30 lbs because I would eat so much.

But I would be happy!

For those of you who don't know morels, they are a wild mushroom that can't be cultivated.  They only grow in the wild.  Which means they're dirty.  Also, as you can tell by the picture above, they're full of holes.  What you can't really tell is that they're also hollow.  And the bugs (which live in the wild) love to go all up inside their hollow-ness.  It's gross.  You need to clean them out well.  Really, really well.  I question the "don't wash mushrooms" mentality in general (they grew in dirt!), but especially for morels.

I prepare them like this:

Fill a large bowl with water, add a generous amount of salt, and stir to dissolve the salt.  For a quarter pound of mushrooms, I would probably use 4 cups of water and 2 tbsp salt.  Add the mushrooms to the water, and gently push them under the water.  Allow them to soak, gently stirring and submerging them occasionally, and trying not to freak out about the things that crawl out of them.  One of mine was completely full of ants.  I screamed and jumped up and down, and ran around the kitchen waving my arms around yelling "ANTS!  Ants, ants, ants, ants, ants!!!!"  If you know me, and would like me to re-enact that for you, I certainly can.  I don't like ants.

Then, after soaking the morels for about 10 minutes, take them out, shake off the water, cut them open the long way, and wash out anything that's still in there.  Which there often is.  I have seen recipes for stuffed morels.  I personally would never feel safe eating a morel unless I had seen the inside and knew that it was ant (or spider, or potato bug, or weird beetle thingy) free.

Morels have a mild earthy/woodsy flavor.  You don't want to overwhelm them.  The traditional use for morels is with eggs - either scrambled or in an omelet.  I did happily eat a morel, feta, and chive omelet.

Here are some more recipes for you.  If you don't have morels/can't justify paying $45 per pound for mushrooms/are freaked out by the thought of cleaning tiny bugs out of your food, you can substitute any other wild mushroom.  I would probably do a shiitake, but you could use portobello or oyster or anything else you could get your hands on. 

Steak with Wild Mushroom Brandy Cream Sauce

• 2 8 oz steaks (or, be like Jeff and me and just make one big porterhouse and share it)
• 1 tbsp olive oil
• 1 small shallot, minced
• 1 clove garlic, minced
• 1/4 lb morel mushrooms, cut in half and sliced into 1/4 inch slices
• 1/4 lb mixed wild mushrooms
• salt and freshly ground pepper
• 1 oz brandy
• 1/4 cup heavy whipping cream

Pre-heat a grill to high heat.  The mushroom recipe will take about 15 minutes total, so time your steaks based on how you prefer them cooked.  It's your opinion, but anything not medium rare is wrong.  Remember to let it rest for 10 minutes before cutting in to it!!

 Heat olive oil in a large frying pan over medium high heat.  Add the shallots and saute until fragrant.  Add the garlic and mushrooms and cook, stirring frequently, until the morels are soft - about 5 minutes.  Add the brandy, and cook about 5 more minutes.  Reduce the heat to low, add the cream, and continue to cook, stirring frequently, until the cream just starts to bubble around the edges of the pan.

I served this over mashed potatoes, with grilled asparagus.


Lemon Butter Pasta with Morels, Spinach, and Lobster

This is the most luxurious recipe ever.  It is not a budget meal.  I would not recommend dried pasta, because you want that silky feel of fresh.  You can generally find fresh pasta in your grocer's cooler.  Or you could make it yourself.  If you have a stand mixer, it's not that hard.

• 4 slices thick cut bacon
• 1/4 cup thinly sliced leeks (white and light green parts)
• 2 cloves garlic, minced
• 1/4 lb well washed morel mushrooms, cut in half
• 1 to 2 tsp capers
• 1 stick butter (yup)
• 4 servings worth of cooked fresh pasta
• 2 cups fresh spinach, washed and sliced into inch thick strips
• 2 lemons
• Salt and freshly ground pepper
• 2 lobster tails, grilled (just throw them on the grill in their shells!)

Render fat out of bacon in a large frying pan with curved sides, over medium heat.  Once the bacon just starts to get crispy, add the leaks and continue to cook until leeks soften - about 3 minutes.  Add the garlic and mushrooms, and continue to saute until mushrooms are very soft, about 10 minutes.  Add capers and saute briefly. Add juice of one lemon and butter, and allow to melt.  Add the pasta and spinach, and stir to combine.  Reduce heat to low, and cover, stirring occasionally until pasta is heated through and spinach is wilted.  Season with salt and pepper to taste.

Top with lobster tails (take them out of the shells now), and lemon wedges.

For the record, I feel okay eating like this, because I've been eating canned beets for free all winter!  Happy spring everyone!!!

Carnitas

What is there not to like about carnitas?  I love pork.  I love Mexican food.  I love tequila.  (Okay, not really directly connected to carnitas, but for some reason just sitting around drinking margaritas without Mexican food makes me feel like a lush.  Unless it's really hot out.  Strange, because I don't feel that way about wine...)

According to Wikipedia (which is back up and running, thank god!  I don't know how I survived prior to having immediate access to questionable information about things that don't really matter...), Carnitas literally means"little meats," and is pork that is braised for 8 to 10 hours at a very low heat, before being pulled apart and then roasted at high heat (375-425 degrees) for a few minutes.  I had never done this final step before, as my recipe just calls for seasoning the meat and throwing it into a crock pot, but I am nothing if not OBSESSED with following the rules of cooking... no, wait.  The opposite of that.

Anyway, the reason given for this final step was to "produce the desired alternating texture of succulent softness and caramelized crispness" which sounded delicious, so I thought I would give it a try.  I think there was a difference, and it really didn't add much cooking time, so I would continue this step.  Also, it makes a lot of sense for how I cook, which is making WAY more meat that Jeff and I can consume in one meal and then heating it up throughout the week for lunches and whatnot.  I figure you only roast up what you're going to eat that day.  If you need more, I only left the meat in for 10 minutes so it's pretty easy to just finish off more.  That makes me think that this would be a really good meal for a dinner party, because you could make all the meat the day before and then just heat it up day of.  Those Mexicans - they're so smart!

Another interesting thing that I learned from Wikipedia is that cartinas is singular, and is JUST the meat.  So, you could use carnitas in anything, and it would still be carnitas.  Which makes me feel good, because my final product is pretty gringo'd up.  Cheddar cheese because I couldn't find any I couldn't find any local chihuahua cheese (also, chihuahua cheese freaks me out - goat cheese comes from goats, where does chihuahua cheese come from?!?), I'm not sure tomatoes are appropriate, and I'm sure bruschetta topping isn't.  Corn tortillas would be the right choice, but there is a local restaurant that makes their own flour tortillas and so I went with that instead.  Sour cream?  Not in any recipe I've seen.    

 

I did use some non-local ingredients here, but they came from a local, privately owned business.  I need chips, and I need guacamole.  Some might say "need" is too strong of a word.  To them I say, "leave me alone, okay?  This is hard, geez.  Give me a break!" 


Carnitas
Modified from William Sonoma: Essentials of Slow Cooking

• Salt and freshly ground pepper
• 1 boneless pork shoulder roast (3-4 lbs)
• 1/4 cup olive oil
• 1 yellow onion, finely chopped
• 2 cloves garlic, minced
• 1/2 cup Mexican Lager style beer
• 1/2 habanero chili
• Grated zest and juice of 1 lime
• splash of orange juice
• 1 tbsp fresh oregano

Season pork generously with salt and pepper.

In a large frying pan over medium-high heat, warm the olive oil.  Add the pork and brown on all sides, working in batches if necessary.  Remove the pork and set aside.

Pour off all but a thin layer of fat from the pan.  Add the onions and garlic and saute until they begin to soften, about 2 minutes.  Add the beer and deglaze the pan, scraping up the browned bits on the bottom of the pan.

Transfer the pork to a slow cooker, and pour in the beer mixture.  Add chili, zest, lime juice, and orange juice, and transfer to a crock pot.  Cook for 10 hours on the low heat setting.  In the last hour, add oregano.

Once the slow cooking is over, pre-heat the oven to 425 degrees.

Transfer the pork to a cutting board and cover loosely with aluminum foil to keep warm and allow to rest for 10 minutes.  Coarsely cut and shred the pork using a sharp knife and a fork.  Skim as much fat as possible from the surface of the cooking liquid.  Transfer the pork to a heavy, oven proof pan and add enough liquid to cover about half way up the meat.  Keep the rest of the liquid warm, just at a simmer.  Bake for 15 to 20 minutes, stirring every 5 minutes, until the liquid in the pan just evaporates.

Transfer the meat to a warmed platter, moisten with additional cooking liquid, and use in tacos, burritos, tamales, etc. as you see fit.

Since, of course, I made way more meat that two people could eat in one meal, I have a lovely leftover recipe.  This does use non-local kumquats, which are probably my favorite fruit ever.  Especially since they're only available in the dead of winter.  They're like little bursts of sunshine, and I wasn't going to miss out.

If you're not trying to be as local as possible, I would use some rice noodles in this recipe, but I did use my own home made spaghetti.  To which I added pork, a few more peppers, some fresh cilantro from the farmer's market, reduced braising liquid and, of course, kumquats.  I sauteed up some garlic with the peppers, then added in two cups braising liquid and simmered until reduced by half.  Then I added the pork and continued to simmer until heated through.  Cooked noodles, then kumquats.  Dish it out, and top with cilantro and more kumquats.  Everything was crazy spicy, but the kumquats are sweet and sour and overall it was pretty awesome.

I don't get people who don't like leftovers.

The New Years Eve Gift that Keeps On Giving

New Years Day = Lazy.  I might not even be hungover.  Truth is, I wasn't.  But I still don't want to do anything.  I don't have to work; I'm certainly not going to work at home!

Take leftover New Years Eve Dinner.  Put all the leftover liquid into a large frying pan.  Add 1 cup chicken stock (or veg. stock, or fish stock).  Bring to a boil.  Add 2 servings fresh, cooked, frozen pasta (that is, pasta that I made fresh, then cooked, then froze.  You could use any cooked pasta.)  Cook, stirring constantly, until just heated through.  Add remaining leftovers (mussels, sweet potatoes, chorizo), and cook until heated through.  Eat and feel overly pleased with yourself for being so gosh darn fancy.

Honestly, most all leftovers + pasta = great dinner the next day.

Fourth and Final Christmas

Sorry Mom.  Sorry Dad.  Sorry other mom and dad.  Sorry step parents and step siblings and whomever else might be offended.  But Christmas #4 was my favorite.

Christmas #4 was the day after Christmas (so I'm only two days behind, if you're counting), and was spent in the company of my best friend Shana, who lives in New York, her friend Chris, and Jeff and my couple friend Denise and Scott.  I didn't worry about cleaning my house.  I didn't worry about being fancy.  Heck, Shana and Chris are vets, so I didn't even have to worry about my pets running amok because they're over all that.

And I got to make a turkey.  For those of you who don't memorize my every post, I have been jonesing to make a turkey since watching far too much Food Network/Cooking Channel at Thanksgiving.  And I even complained about not having the room/time to throw a turkey related dinner party.  Shows what I know!  Just another example of how you can't believe EVERYTHING your read on the internet.  Just stuff you read on Wikipedia.  That's all that's for sure true.

It was overall a successful evening, with just one minor flaw.  That being, I may have almost burned down my house.  I'm not sure.

I used a combination of two Alton Brown turkey recipes - brined and butterflied.  More specifically, I used the second recipe for dry brined, butterflied turkey, but instead of doing a dry brine I did a traditional brine.  Unfortunately, the recipe calls for placing the bird directly onto the oven rack of a 425 degree oven.  Of course, you put a pan below to catch the drippings, but you're still left with turkey fat dripping down, sizzling, and creating a lot of smoke.  A LOT of smoke.  Really.  I don't know if I did something wrong (the recipe does call for you to put root vegetables into the roasting pan under the turnkey, but I don't see why this would reduce the level of smoke.)  I suspect that Alton's fancy on camera kitchen and oven are both larger, better, and more well ventilated than mine, because we definitely had to open up all the windows and take down the lower level smoke detectors (hmm... have I put those back up yet...?  Better check on that).  In a moment of panic I even transferred the turkey from the oven rack into the actual rack of my roasting pan - hoping that this would cut down on the smoke building up inside my oven.  I don't think it did.  Really, the only thing that did anything was reducing the heat - which thankfully the recipe called for after 30 minutes.  So, I don't know if I did something wrong, or if my kitchen just isn't set up for that kind of thing, or if that was just what was supposed to happen.  Regardless, it was just a little bit of too much exciting.  The turkey was absolutely perfect, moist, browned, crispy skinned, and delicious, but I'll still think twice before trying that technique again.

We had pasta instead of potatoes because I am sick of potatoes, and because Shana mostly just eats pasta (not just as a substitute for potatoes.  Like, that is all she eats.  Like a small child.)  Plus I look for any opportunity to have this conversation:

"Do you like the pasta?"
"Yes, it's very good."
"I made it myself."
"What, like the sauce?"
"Well, yes, the sauce, but also the actual pasta."
"What?? You make your own pasta?"
"Why yes, I do.  I'm fancy."

And... scene.

Having really gotten pasta down, it is now quite easy.  Using my stand mixer, I let the dough kneed for a long time, but I don't have to do anything.  This time, I actually kneeded the dough while in the shower.  Now that's multitasking!

The pasta recipe I used was actually a modification of a Giada De Laurentis recipe, which is unusual because I don't really care for her.  She has far too many teeth.  But it worked out well, too, because we ended up watching Giada before dinner - mostly with the sound off making fun of her reaching for bowls that were just slightly out of her reach.  If you've seen the show, you'll get it.

Some of the reviews for this recipe said it was grainy and bland.  I'm not sure if the modifications I made prevented this, or if other people just overcooked the sauce, but I had no problems with consistency, and the six of us polished all of this pasta off as a side dish.  There could have been more.  It may have been the first time that I didn't make way too much food.

I like the wings!!!

Brined, Butterflied Turkey:

For the Brine:

• 1 cup kosher salt
• 1/2 cup light brown sugar
• 1 tbsp black peppercorns
• 1 1/2 tsp allspice berries
• 2 1 inch chunks fresh garlic
• 4-5 large cloves garlic - smashed
• 2 bay leafs
• 3 sprigs rosemary
• 1 gallon plus more ice cold water
• Ice cubes

For the Turkey:

• 1 12 lb (ish) Turkey - thawed
• 3 sprigs rosemary
• 3 garlic cloves
• 1 lemon peel, pith removed
• 1 stick butter, cut into 1 inch chunks

In a large pot, or cooler, or whatever (my dad uses a garbage bag.  I think that's gross.  I used my canning pot) combine all brine ingredients except ice and stir to combine and dissolve salt.  Add turkey (just the turkey.  Remove any reject bits from the cavity of the turkey, if included, and reserve for stock).  Add ice and additional water to cover turkey.  Store in a cold place (back porch, garage, etc) for 8 to 16 hours.

Remove turkey from brine and discard brine, with the exception of rosemary sprigs.

Rinse turkey inside and out with cold water, and dry thoroughly. 

Butterfly turkey by removing back bone using a sharp kitchen shears or heavy knife.  Reserve back bone for stock.  Place turkey cut side down on a large cutting board, and push down firmly until breast bone snaps and the turkey flattens slightly.

Pre-heat oven to 425 degrees.

In a food processor, combine rosemary, garlic, and lemon peel, and process until minced.  Add butter and process until well combined.  Rub the butter into the skin of the turkey (this will only work if the turkey is actually dry).

If you're feeling bold, place the turkey (cut side down) directly on the oven rack above a large roasting pan.  Or, for the less brave, use a rack inside of a roasting pan.  Tuck the rosemary sprigs from the brine into various folds in the turkey.

Bake at 425 for 30 minutes.  Then reduce the heat and bake at 350 degrees until the internal temperature of the turkey reaches 155 degrees - an additional 40 to 50 minutes.  Allow to rest 30 minutes before slicing.


Fettuccine Bake

• 1 lb fresh fettuccine pasta
• 2 cups grated white cheddar cheese
• 1 cup grated Romano cheese
• 1 cup sour cream
• 1 cup heavy cream
• 1 1/2 tablespoons fresh chopped rosemary leaves
• 1/2 tsp salt 
• 1/2 tsp freshly ground black pepper

Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil over high heat. Add the pasta and cook until not quite al dente, stirring occasionally. 

In a large bowl combine the remaining ingredients. Gently toss with the pasta until all the ingredients are combined and the pasta is coated. Place the pasta in a buttered baking dish. At this point, you can cover the pasta and store in the fridge until ready to bake.  Let sit at room temperature for 30 minutes before baking.

Bake at 375 degrees until golden on top - about 25 minutes.  Let sit for at least 5 minutes before serving

A Plethora of Pumpkin, Part 1

Pumpkin: It's not just for pies and Jack-o-Lanterns!

Really.

I like looking at the recipe slide shows and featured recipes on sites like epicurious.com and foodnetwork.com.  Recently, obviously, they've been featuring a lot of fall foods and flavors.  Like squash.  I am a fan of squash in all of its forms, so I am not complaining, but I was surprised at how few recipes there are for pumpkin that aren't dessert recipes.  Pumpkin is just a kind of squash.  It is not sweet on its own and, in my mind, is not any more suited for pie than any other squash.

Okay, I take that back.  I guess it's a little less stringy than some other squashes, so maybe it's a consistency thing.  I guess a spaghetti squash pie might be kind of disgusting.  Or excellent.  If it were a savory pie...

That's a try for another day!

Anyway, my point is, pumpkin is good for anything that you might use another kind of squash in.  Pumpkins themselves also have kinds - just ask anyone who has ever made a pumpkin pie from scratch.  You don't want to cook with the same kind of pumpkin that you make a jack-o-lantern with.

I believe this is either a Blue Lakota pumpkin, or a Jarrahdale pumpkin.  I'm not in any way positive about either, but it matches both of the descriptions I found online.  The shape leads me to think it's a Jarrahdale, because the Blue Lakota are supposed to be pear shaped, however the Jarradales are grown in Australia, and the Blue Lakota's are supposed to be grown in the Midwest...
 

Either way, this pumpkin is excellent.  The thick flesh means that you get more to work with, and it's smoother than the Jack-o-Lantern pumpkins.  It also has an exceptionally thick skin, which means they should keep well in storage.  This was my only one, so I'm going to see if I can find another one (and maybe find out for reals what it was).

This is a Jack-o-Lantern.  These kinds of pumpkins have names too, but I don't know what I had.  Big orange.  I made a Cylon from BSG because I'm a big nerd:

Anyway, so I cut up the peeled and chopped up the pumpkin (the blue one, not the Cylon) into 1 inch cubes, and coated the cubes with salt, white pepper, nutmeg, cloves, and cinnamon.  I also tossed in a full head of garlic, separated into its individual cloves, peeled, and slightly crushed.  I then baked it for 30 minutes, until the pumpkin was nice and soft.  In theory, you could easily just eat the pumpkin like this as a side dish.  If I was doing that, I probably would have added a bit more salt at the time of roasting.

But instead, I decided I wanted to make a pasta sauce.  I took six cups of the pumpkin and threw it in the food processor, and turned it into a puree. It was really good at this point, too. Kind of like smooth mashed potato pumpkin.  I added 1/2 of a container of mascarpone cheese, and blended that all together.

For the record, this was way too much for two people.  If I made this pasta again, I would probably use half as much or even less.  However, I did save the pumpkin/mascarpone mixture that I didn't use, and do have a plan for it if I get to it before it goes bad.

Meanwhile I made up some pasta, and chopped up some chanterelle and shitake mushrooms and sauteed them in butter.  I also chopped up a bunch of kale and steamed it.  Once everything was done, I added the pasta and sauce to a big frying pan, and stirred until the pasta was well coated.  It was a little thick, so I ended up adding a few splashes of half and half as well.  I stirred in the kale and mushrooms, and when it was all mixed together I topped the whole thing with a few nice sized flakes of smoked trout from Rushing Rivers.

Overall, 100% local, except the spices.

I absolutely loved this, and thought it was even better heated up the next day which is rare for pasta.  Jeff, however, did not care for it at all.  Because of this, I had more leftover than I could eat on my own before it went bad, so I picked out all of the mushrooms (I'm not letting chanterelles go to waste!) and added them to my pumpkin soup.

What's that?  Pumpkin soup you say?  Better wait for "A Plethora of Pumpkin, Part 2!"

According to my friend/co-worker who is sitting behind me and reading over my shoulder, this should have been actual pumpkin pasta, not a pumpkin pasta sauce.  Direct quote: "uh, I want to be eating that, so you should probably get on it right now."  Check.  Don't make her angry!

That will have to be a "Plethora of Pumpkin Part X."